Peanut's Post: Ghost Mom and the Single Dad

You may remember a time when I was really into Mommy.  For whatever reason, Daddy just didn't exist to me.

Well I was really glad to have Daddy at the doctor a few weeks ago when I got my shots.  He makes a nice pillow, which made me feel better....

And Mommy's been doing a lot of this lately.... 

I know she's around, but holy cow does she stare at those books all day long!!  I'm pretty sick of it.  Anyway, with most of her focus on "passing" these days (whatever that means), Daddy and I spend a lot of time together, which I've really enjoyed.  When he walks by, I drop what I'm doing and crawl over to him.  I reach up and moan until he picks me up.  Daddy says it's great at home, but not so great when he's dropping me off at daycare. 

In case I slip back into my "obsessed with Mommy" phase, I thought I'd document some of our Daddy-daughter activities.  A typical day might look like this....

Daddy will get me up in the morning.  Usually I'm in my favorite sleeping position....on my knees with my butt in the air, blanket tossed aside.  I don't know what it is about this position...I guess it's just super comfy.  Don't knock it 'till you've tried it. 

After breakfast and some crawling around, he likes to put me in the backpack and take me on walks.  But sometimes I just fall asleep.

Sometimes we'll do random projects around the house.  Apparently it's important to "baby proof," but I cry when I hear the sound of the drill.

We eat some lunch together.  He tells me I'm a mess.  I put my hand on his shoulder, point my baby finger, and say, "Ad bahdvheal dafma," which loosely translated means, "No I'm not, I'm a baby."  He'll get it one day.

"Daddy, how come the stuff on your face doesn't come off in the bath?"

I get worn out faster than he does, so he'll put me down for a nap.  I'll, of course, work myself into my favorite sleeping position.

After some rest and a bottle, it's time to play.  Sometimes, we go to the pool. 


"Ok, I'm ready to go to the pool....let's go!"

"Will anyone take me to the pool?  Anyone?"


My bathing suit is a little small, but the bottom still fits.  So on this day, I went topless.  But Daddy says "we can't have that" so he's going to buy me a new suit.


"Maybe if I get on my tiptoes I can find someone to take me to the pool."



"Mommy, so good to see you!  Are you coming to the pool too?"



"Mommy can't come to the pool with us!"

Towards the end of the day, Daddy gives me a bath.  I like to watch him fill the tub as I throw all of my bath toys on the floor.

Then I get my last bottle for the day, and lately I get some yucky medicine too (which sometimes winds up on Daddy's shirt).  If it's been an especially exciting day, I'll fall asleep on Daddy's shoulder, although usually I squirm until he puts me down. 

BA's Corner: Hospital Nursery Story

Here's a funny story from the night Leah was born.  We've been telling it to friends and family ever since.  So we figured we should immortalize it by putting it on the blog. 

After Leah was born and we moved to the recovery room, I got to tag along with the nurses to watch Leah get her first bath in the nursery. This was my first time in a hospital nursery. While it wasn't like TV or the movies, it was still pretty cool.

One of the things we liked about this hospital was that the baby stayed with the parents during the entire visit. As new parents, we didn't want to think about leaving our new baby in the nursery, and of course we were afraid of a baby mix-up! So we thought this was a good approach. But when I walked into the nursery, there were babies lined up along all sides of the hallways. I couldn't believe it. I asked myself, "Where did all of these babies come from?" There were babies of every size, shape, and color. I thought, "Wow, all of these parents have the option to keep their babies in their room, so why are they all here? Bad parents, I suppose.

On the second full day, we were talking with the nurses and trying to figure out how we could best take advantage of some of the advice they'd all given us, as well as the full battery of hospital resources, before we were on our own for good. We had a revelation...if we sent Leah to the nursery for the night, we could get some sleep, and they'd just bring her to us when she was hungry. Pretty sweet deal. Every few hours, they'd knock on the door, roll Leah in, and tell us how she was doing. After she ate, they rolled her right back to the nursery and we tried to get some more sleep.

So now we understood. All those babies in the nursery during our first night....those were 2nd night babies (or just second babies)! Not bad parents...smart parents.

BA's Corner: Ghost Dad and the Single Mom

Leah is absolutely enamored with Mommy these days. I don’t even exist. It doesn’t bother me too much…I think it’s great that AA is getting so much affection from her. It’s just funny how obvious it is.

When we were at the Reagan Museum 2 weeks ago, we all sat down for a nice, casual lunch. Leah was in her stroller between us, and she stared at AA the whole time. When AA got up to use the restroom, Leah followed her with her eyes until she couldn’t see her anymore. I warned Leah before AA left that she’d be “all alone” while Mommy was in the bathroom. When she couldn’t see AA anymore, she stared at the family in the next booth. None of that family turned to look at Leah, but she was content to stare at them for several minutes until Mommy made it back (and she was no longer alone).

When I picked her up from daycare this week, Leah seemed confused. All of a sudden, she had been lifted in the air, put in her car seat, and driven home. Mommy was nowhere to be found, so there was no logical explanation for it. Must have been a ghost.

Today, we sat Leah on the bed while AA was doing some things. I walked in and crouched down, about 3 inches right in front of her face. Leah continued to stare at AA. When AA left the room, Leah stared at the door until she returned. At one point, AA got behind me so Leah couldn’t see her. Leah looked all over the room, scanning it with her eyes in search of Mommy. When AA popped her head up, Leah whipped her head around, completely skipped my face, and looked straight at AA. Over and over again.

She also likes to pull her head forward when she’s in her car seat lately. Many times she’s looking for a good shoulder strap to munch on. Maybe she's looking for her single mom. But mostly I think she's just curious and doesn't want to miss anything going by. She’s actually been falling asleep in that position - her body is tilted back, but she tilts her head forward. And it takes a little muscle to get her head back against the back of the seat. I have no idea why she’s decided that’s more comfortable than just resting her head back.

BA's Corner: Hold my Hand, Part 2

As AA finishes up her last few finals of the semester, here's the continuation of "Hold my Hand."

On Leah's first day of daycare, AA couldn't handle it. She cried too much and I had to take Leah that morning. Leah seemed okay, but she also seemed like she knew something was different. After all, she'd been at home pretty much the whole time since she'd been born, except for some doctor visits. So she knew when we were getting out of her "routine." I walked her out, loaded her in the car, and headed off. She was pretty quiet, and I couldn't see her. So I reached my hand back into her car seat to see if I could feel her moving around or something. She immediately grabbed my finger. I smiled.

There are other times too....strapping Leah into the Express and heading out for a walk, middle of the night feedings, etc. And the first night we officially put Leah in her crib for the night, I had to keep running in to soothe her. She held onto my thumb until she was finally snoring away.

Secretly, when I'm soothing her back to sleep in the middle of the night, I like to hold her hand. I think it makes a difference. I know she won't want to do this forever, and I just love how small and soft they are. Plus, one of the first things I discovered about her (and that I still love) is that she has AA's hands. When I picked her up from daycare that first week and all the babies looked somewhat the same to me, I could be sure I had my Leah by looking at her hands.

BA's Corner: Hold My Hand, Part 1

Since AA is feverishly studying for exams, I figured I needed to step up to the plate with a new post for the weekend.

Moms have a connection...it's just built in. It's part of the reward they get (if not the only unique reward) for all the suffering they go through to bear a child.

So it's nice for dads to have something too. The night Leah was born, I was so thrilled when Leah finally came out, because I knew that AA's pain was almost over. And I wanted AA to hold her first. She'd been the one to shoulder most of the load, and certainly she'd been the one "taking" Leah to the doctor multiples times a week. She'd been the one doubled over the toilet in the middle of the night, not me. And when it was my turn to hold Leah, I mostly focused on not screwing up...not dropping her, not letting her head fall, not waking her up, and not making her cry.

But when we moved to the recovery room and the nurses came to take Leah for her first bath, I jumped at the chance to tag along, while AA stayed in the recovery room. This was one of my first tasks as a Dad without AA there. Granted, all I had to do was watch the nurses and pay attention.

The nurse finished bathing Leah, and she finished crying (for the time being). The nurse walked away for a few minutes, and there were a couple of other babies in the room getting cleaned up. There was one in particular, about 5-6 feet away from us, who was really crying. His dad was standing there with his arms crossed, just watching him. Must have been a second child! I was a deer in headlights staring at Leah, with a trigger finger on the camera. And I was slightly afraid to touch her for fear that I would do something wrong!

I imagine what Leah must have been going through during those first few hours of life. How strange it must have been for her, and how scared and confused she probably was. And while I was excited, I was also pretty terrified. It was probably 2 a.m. after a long, life-altering day. We were in a strange place, and, to some extent, we were strangers to each other.

I knew she was scared. As I had imagined for months, I reached out my hand and she grabbed onto my finger as tightly as she could. I like to think it was the first time she realized that the voice she had been hearing all these months was her Daddy, and that no matter how strange, confusing, and scary this new world was, she knew she was going to be okay because Daddy was right beside her.

And I like to think that, in that same moment, Leah was thinking the same thing about me...that I must be scared at the unfamiliar burden ahead of me, but that she was right there with me, hanging on. And together, we'd be okay.

And that's why this is one of my favorite pictures. It was our first moment together, alone.

July 12, 2011 taken at approximately 2:00 a.m.

BA's Corner: The Evolution of Laundry

I typically do the laundry in the house, so this is my domain.  Now, I've had a lot of life changes over the past decade.  But it's amazing how something as simple as laundry has been forced to evolve with those changes.

As a college student, it was cheaper to throw everything in 1 load and wash it on cold.  Easy.  Done.  (Yes, Mom, I know that it's not the best way, and I know things don't get washed as well.  But I was a broke college student...can you blame me?)

As a bachelor, I advanced to whites and darks.  Simple enough.

As a married man, I quickly learned that there are three separate stacks: whites, lights, and darks.  This later evolved to whites, mediums, and darks.  I still don't know the difference, but apparently it sounds better.

As a father of a little girl, I know there are 4 piles: whites, mediums, darks, and pink.  It's true. One whole load of pink.

Pink pink pink....

It's tough to catch her still...blurry legs are common in our pictures!

BA's Corner: For the Record

I'm starting a new series on the blog titled "For the Record." These will be short, informational pieces designed to document little things as they happen...things that might be interesting to know down the road.

My adorable little Leah.... A couple of nights ago (10/17/11) was the first night we had to drive you around town to get you to calm down. So from 8 to 9:30 p.m., I drove you up and down Ventura Blvd. I think you were actually coming down with a fever.

We started listening to Brahms 2, then switched to Yo-Yo Ma playing the Prelude to Bach Cello Suite #1. This was one of the songs we played to you in the womb, hoping that once you were born, hearing it would calm you down. It seems to work (a little). I played that one over and over again. I played Rachmaninoff's Elegie also, then landed on a classical guitar CD, which worked pretty well. I came home mid-way through, but you woke up. So we picked up your mother and headed back out.

Of course, as soon as we walked in the door at 9:30, you started wailing away again.

Just for the record.

BA's Corner: Penny Saved

Papa gave Leah her first piggy bank a while ago, and I wanted her to be the first one to contribute to her savings. Here's her side of the story on how that went.

"Cool, I have a quarter. No idea what that means, but people tell me it's a good thing and everyone's smiling at me, so I'm happy."

"Hmmmm...wait a minute. What's going on now? Daddy seems to be inching my hand (with quarter) towards the foolproof container. Must...fight....back."

"Wait! Wait! I said I want that.... Wait!"

"No No Nooooooooooo!!!!!"

"Was that absolutely necessary?!?! I see your lips moving, but you're just not making any sense to me. Savings, Schmavings. Save the lecture Daddy."

"Ugh...I really don't think that was necessary."

BA's Corner: ZZZZ

You know you need some sleep when you start asking yourself where you can take naps while getting other things accomplished.

For example, I pulled up to a stoplight the other day. As soon as my car came to a stop, I immediately thought to myself, "I'll probably be here for a couple of minutes. I wonder if I can squeeze in a nap? I'm sure if I roll into the middle of the intersection, somebody will let me know."

The lines are blurred these days. I'll wake up and think Leah is still on top of me, or that AA just asked me to wake up and hold her for a few minutes while she uses the restroom. Over the next 15 seconds of wake/sleep/dreaming/confusion, the situation will rapidly deteriorate until the Peanut has vanished into thin air, fallen off the bed, or disappeared into the sheets. Before I can live my life again, I'll have to rush out into the living room to make sure that AA still has Leah and it was all a dream. So far, it's always been a dream. Whew!

The truth is, Peanut, you're worth every sleepless minute.

BA's Corner: Chain Gang

I'll be starting a support group for new Dads who have to return to work. It's tough to get fired up about work these days. I took 2 weeks off, but I needed at least 6. Aside from the adjustment and the bonding, sleep deprivation is no joke and AA can't do all of this alone. Besides, she's back in school now, so she's got her own problems to deal with. Fortunately, we've had great help.

Here's a picture from when I arrived home after my first day back in the office.

Depending on my schedule, I can sometimes get around this depression and still get my work done...

Hey, it works. Usually.

BA's Corner: Lessons to New Fathers from a New Father

When I found out I was going to be a father, I did the only thing I know to do in any situation I don't know much about. I set out on a journey to collect as much information about the topic at hand as I could...books, internet research, friendly advice, people with more experience, etc. I knew I had a lot to learn, and I was anxious to learn it from those who had come before me.

The closer the due date came, the more advice I seemed to get. Much of it was duplicative at this point. What I began to realize is that each book was part of it's own philosophy or method, often conflicting with other books. In fact, it seemed that every nurse in the hospital subscribed to their own philosophy, which they shared with us at all hours of the night (much of it I was half asleep for). For instance...

What to Expect the First Year - This is the gold standard, of course. So much so, that we actually received several copies as gifts! I read about milk storage, cracking the crying code, and poop colors for many hours on airplanes this year. In April, I actually sat next to a woman on a plane who was also reading this book! Being non-social, I didn't let on. The downside of this book is that it's overkill. (Plus, it's got a really girly cover. Come on...guys are interested too!)

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child - This is the #2 book I chose to focus on. It came recommended by some trusted friends. It emphasizes the importance of sleep and how to recognize drowsiness so you can maximize sleep for the long-term health of the child. I really bought into this, and still do. But for the first 2 weeks, this book simply doesn't apply. There's no mention of feeding, which is the real #1. Without feeding, you can forget about sleep habits.

Happiest Baby on the Block. I didn't read this one, but one of the nurses was talking about the 5 S's that came from this book (or was I dreaming when she was talking?). I don't remember what the S's were, but I can tell you there are a lot more than 5.

There are others. One book emphasizes natural bonding with the child, one emphasizes a strict schedule to eventually ease parents' workload. Everybody's got to make their money in the baby business these days. Oh, and I'm here to tell you that my daughter is cuter than almost all of the babies in these books.

One nurse said there are only 5 reasons babies cry: they're hot, cold, dirty, hungry, or need TLC. Ma'am, I'm sorry, but there are a million other reasons...starting with gassy, tired, overtired, scared, uncomfortable, not swaddled, too tightly swaddled, grumpy, or just plain bored of peace and quiet so they want to hear themselves wail away. Not every good piece of advice comes in fives.

The list goes on....

Then when Leah was born, I quickly realized a few more lessons on my own.

1. Things won't happen as you planned them. No matter how many times you pack and re-pack the labor bag, you'll scramble at the last minute with your wife already at the hospital, shouting commands to you over the phone.

2. You can be prepared, but you can't bank up on your sleep. Believe me, I've tried.

3. You're going to lose every argument for a while. Your wife just pushed a human being out of her.

4. Nobody knows what to do, so don't even try to learn beforehand. Just do what comes naturally, and find a good pediatrician! You'll know you have one if you can envision yourself hanging out at a backyard BBQ with him/her.

5. You'll have to make some choices over the next couple of weeks. For example, when you unexpectedly find that you have an extra 30 minutes at your disposal, you'll have to decide if you should eat dinner, take a shower, or take a nap. For me, the meals usually fall to the bottom of that list. And baseball caps come in handy. Go for the nap.

6. Get to know your local Target and Babies R Us stores. Sounds kind of silly, but when the baby is crying and your wife is exhausted, it's nice to know that the thermometers are on Aisle 23 so you can get back home.

7. There is no magic trick. We had pages of notes for labor...different positions and techniques. We burned through those in about 5 minutes, and nothing really worked. For the baby, we bought the swing, the bouncer, the music box, the mobile, the car seat shade, the humidifer, the snuggly blanket, etc. Everything works a little. But if you're thinking that the one thing you spent hours putting together is going to save you at 4 a.m., you can forget about it. There is no magic trick that's going to stop the crying...that would be too easy. (P.S. If you have a magic trick that you're not telling me about, it's time you fess up.) However, I'm sure that these tools will work one day. I guess I expected the baby to come out craving the darn swing I put together....she's much more interested in showing me the back of her throat combined with her brute leg strength.

8. Diapers are no big deal. Don't even sweat it. I changed my first diaper on 3 hours of sleep with no instruction. It was actually exciting because it was just one step closer to taking our girl home.

9. You will spend a lot of your time over the next week or two on your feet. Kind of funny, but everywhere you go, there will be a seat for your wife, but probably not a seat for you. And you'll be attending to all of your wife's needs. She can't and shouldn't be walking very much, so it'll be up to you to do everything for her....carrying, cleaning, driving, whatever. Refer to item #3 above.

10. Lastly, be prepared for the thrill of your life! That day has got to be the most amazing day of your life. (It's quickly followed by the toughest transition of your life). That little thing is going to be so soft, your heart is going to melt. If not, you're not human. And the sound of that crying is straight from heaven (for a day or so).

BA's Corner: Hangin' Out

I've found myself watching ESPN at night lately. Not because I love baseball and pre-season NFL games, but because I need something to combat all of the talk of breastfeeding and milk. Just an injection of manhood in my primarily girly days lately.

That said, I've enjoyed carrying the tiny whippersnapper around in her baby carrier a few times. She's confused at first but falls asleep in it pretty quickly. She enjoys feeling the breeze in her toes.

Plus, Leah is a chick magnet in this thing. Two girls came up to me when they saw her little legs dangling out of it. One shouted from across the parking lot, "Do you actually have a newborn in there?" "Yes, I do," said proud daddy. "A week and a half old." Then I scurried off, assuming they didn't have an updated TDAP vaccination.

Leah is oblivious though. Check out the position she wound up in by the end of the walk!

But you can tell she's growing up, because she fills out the carrier a little more these days...

A good solution when you need a free hand...

She usually falls asleep (at least something makes her fall asleep!)

BA's Corner: Our Medical Marvel

Leah,

I can already tell you’re a leader. Doctors have doubted you – you were smaller than they wanted you to be all along. But you have proven all of them wrong. You are so strong….kicking up a storm, moving your head all around, waving your arms around and shaking your fists like you have something to prove.

When you were 2.5 days old, we took you to the pediatrician for the first time. We said you were rolling around and were concerned about your sleeping arrangement. He said we shouldn’t worry because you can’t roll that much yet. We laid you on the table on your back, and you rolled immediately onto your left side. He paused and said, “Woah, I’ve never seen that at this age.” We said, “See…I told you.”

At that same appointment, the doctor gave you a Hepatitis B shot in the leg. We all braced for the screaming, and your mom couldn’t even watch. After the doctor finished, he said, “She’s going to hate me now.” You began crying, so I scooped you up into my arms. Then you gave 2 shouts, put your head on my shoulder, and immediately stopped crying. The doctor stopped in his tracks and said, “Wow.”

Doctors were concerned with your weight after the first day. You were put on an every 2-hour feeding schedule, 24 hours a day during the first weekend. The goal was to get you back to 5 lbs. 10 oz. by Monday morning. You hit 5 lbs. 12 oz. You weren’t supposed to be at your birth weight until 2 weeks old. On Wednesday (1 week and 1.5 days), you were 6 lbs 1 oz. The doctor said we didn't need to come back for a while.

Also at this appointment (1 week and 1.5 days), we had the doctor check your umbilical cord stump. He said they don’t fall off for several weeks. Then he looked at yours and said “Oh, this is coming off in the next few days.” It came off that night.

You are also courageous. You are willing to be the first child for your mom and me. You patiently wait while we learn by trial and error, and you forgive us when we make mistakes. Thank you for paving the way.

Welcome to the world, little one. We are so excited that you’re here, and that you are ours.

Love,
Dad

BA's Corner: Your Move

It was 2:55 a.m. last night. I know because I logged it in Leah's "Event Log" - the place where we record her feedings and diaper changes.

Leah was sleeping in our room for the first time since we brought her home from the hospital. We had attempted this before, but she would never go to sleep during the night without being held. So we had been swapping shifts...mine was basically 11 p.m. to 4 a.m. AA's shift was essentially every other hour, but she also handled 4-6 a.m., until her mother sprung out of bed with open arms to relieve us until 8 or 9 a.m. (with the exception of AA's feedings every other hour).

But on this night, my job was to wake whenever Leah stirred, scoop her up, assist AA as much as possible, and then soothe Leah back to sleep after she was fed, burped, etc. And I tried to let AA sleep as much as possible. So if Leah awoke because of anything except hunger, the ball was in my court.

I should also mention that we had tricked Leah into sleeping in the room with us. She was asleep in my arms in the living room, but as soon as I set foot in the bedroom, her eyes opened up. I think it was a change in lighting....she must be clairvoyant or something. So I immediately stepped back into the living room, adjusted the bedroom lighting to match, soothed her, and put her down in the bassinet. Once she was asleep, I very carefully slid her bassinet inch by inch into the bedroom. My hope was that if she awoke in the bassinet in our bedroom, she would think "Oh, this isn't such a bad place...maybe I'll enjoy sleeping here more often in the future." I pretend my 1 week old thinks logically.

So there we were....the dead of night, just my little girl and me. It was dark and quiet. Leah began crying, so I went through my routine.

1) Soothe. We're talking bouncing, rocking, swinging, swaddling, talking, singing, ssssshhhhhhhing, etc. Tons of stuff I would never admit to in "guy talk." Anything and everything in the book. If I'm lucky, that will solve it, and we can all go back to sleep. Tonight....nada.

2) Since #1 never works at 2:55 a.m., it's diaper time. As the crying crescendos, I unzip the sleeper and try to hang onto this kicking, screaming mess long enough to assess the situation. It was a bad one, but nothing I couldn't handle to get AA some zzzz's (she certainly needs them these days).

I lifted Leah's legs and began to clean up. The crying intensified, but I expected it, so I was not alarmed. I continued the task at hand.

Leah upped the ante.

Just as I cleaned up and reached for the fresh diaper, the waterworks began. So I cleaned them up. Then I realized it was all down her back, soaked into the sleeper, and all over the changing table pad. Hmmmmm.....

I cleaned it up as best I could. Then I scooped her up in my arms and looked her in the eyes. As I supported her head, I realized it was actually in her hair too! I thought, "Man, I'm a bad father right now." Then I looked around....I had no fresh sleeper for her, a pile full of wet/dirty wipes, a dirty diaper, a soaked changing table cover, a sleeping wife, and a daughter staring me in the face. I realized the Peanut had taken control of the trickery we had put her through....I couldn't slip one past her this time. She calmed her crying long enough to shoot me a glance similar to the one below, as if saying to me....


"Your move, Daddy-O. What are you going to do now?"

My reply....

"Well played, sweetheart. Well played."

BA's Corner: Assembly Required

Have new fathers always been required to put together a ton of furniture, or is this a recent development? Perhaps the infusion of big box retailers like IKEA and Target have brought on an era where everyone assumes Daddy-O is chomping at the bit to translate diagrams with stick figures, drawings, and arrows into the wee hours of the night. In any case, I think I've got it down now. Here's how it usually works for me:

1. Get the toolbox. I'm very thankful that I actually have a toolbox, and it has come in handy time and time again. However, every time I retrieve it, I'm reminded of how I've saved all sorts of little tools and screws (that I'll never use again) from things I've put together over the years...so many that I also have an old backpack full of tools that "I just might need one day." I envision a 3-car garage with a full wall of tools (and a shiny '68 Camaro) in my future. I may not know what I'm doing, but I can at least look the part.

2. Grab the tool belt (optional). Only necessary if I'm in the mood to be heckled. There is no requirement that I actually put tools in the toolbelt - it's strictly for show until I get the above-referenced garage.

3. Open the instructions. If they're from IKEA, I tell AA that the Swedes want me to enlist the help of a friend with a smile and a pencil behind his/her ear. She typically declines.

The remainder of the event can go in any number of directions, depending on how much floor space is required and how many "jobbies" are involved. "Jobbie" is my term for pretty much anything that comes in the box, particularly if I don't know what the thing is actually called.

Given my recent adventures in assembling all of the furniture under the sun, I figured I'm in a good position to share a few of my most notable tools....

• Favorite Tool: Cordless Drill. What guy doesn't like his cordless drill? In the words of Tim Taylor, "MORE POWER!"
• Least Favorite Tool: Allen Wrench. Why in the world do these companies build this furniture that requires the use of a stubby little tool that requires you to work your little fingers to the bone trying to turn that stupid thing around and around. And why don't they sell variety toolkits with fancy, comfortable allen wrenches? And why the heck has no one invented a way to use an allen wrench attachment on a...you guessed it...CORDLESS DRILL??
• Least Likely Tool: Silicone Potholders. Why, you ask? Well, sometimes you just have to be resourceful. I don't even remember what I was assembling, but something kept turning whenever I screwed it in, and grippy potholders were the best things I could find to deal with it.
• Toughest Assembly: Glider. Something about the gliding mechanism...I thought I'd chop my fingers off before I was done.
• Biggest Box: Ottoman. But no problemo...it came fully assembled! Whew!

Cardboard anyone? Just don't light a match within 10 yards.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there but especially to both my Dad and BA!  My Dad was a great dad.  He was so involved in my upbringing, and he has been a great example to BA of how to raise a girl.  My dad was Mr. Athletic in high school and college and he would have loved to have a boy.  He'd have been little league coach for every sports team and he'd have been outside playing catch with the boy every day.  But my dad had two girls - two girly-girls who were more interested in picking flowers, singing songs, and dancing than sports.  Even still, he volunteered to help coach my 4th grade softball team, despite the fact that I was terrible and mostly played right field (that's where they put the kids who are afraid of the ball).  He even volunteered to coach my 5th grade soccer team even though he'd never played a day of soccer in his life.  My team needed a coach and no other parents were stepping up.  So my dad volunteered to be head coach, went to the library, got a book on soccer, and coached the team.  And in high school, he was assistant coach of my tennis team and would be out there on the high school courts hitting balls with the me and the other students every afternoon in the spring.  But my dad's involvement didn't stop with sports.  When we were little, he'd play the guitar and sing songs with us, he let us play "hair-design" on him, he got roles in the community theater plays we were in so the whole family could be in the play together, he would surprise us at school and eat lunch with us.  He prepared family breakfast every Saturday.  I have vivid memories of waking up on Saturday mornings to the smell of homemade buttermilk pancakes and the sound of Dad's music (either New Age or Irish tunes, depending on what phase he was currently in) coming from downstairs.  He was also the only Dad chaperone on a week-long bus trip to Washington D.C. for my 4th grade class.  All the other chaperone's were Mom's.  He was always there, always playing with us, and that's what makes him so great.  I have a great Dad. 

For BA's first unofficial Father's Day, I decided to take the five favorite things he lists in his profile on this blog (sleep, chocolate, Chick-fil-A, FSU football, and classical music) and make a gift for each one. 

There's a C.D. of Mozart to represent the classical music we will be playing all day.
We have a Chick-fil-A card, promising to take him to Chick-fil-A for lunch.
We have brownies for chocolate.
And we have flannel pajama pants that I secretly sewed while BA was away last week in Dallas, to represent sleep; also in FSU colors for FSU football. 

BA is going to be a great Dad, I know it.  He told me not to do anything for him because the Peanut isn't born yet so he doesn't feel like a father yet.  But I said, you're already buying things for her and assembling all her furniture - that's what Dad's do and you'll be doing it for the next 20 years!  You're a father.

BA's Corner: Really?

It's hard to believe something this small is going to keep me up all night.