Daycare

We picked out a daycare this week.  Of course the guilt kicked in.  How could I leave my child in daycare?  I never thought I would be a daycare parent.  My mother stayed home with me and my sister full time and I felt so guilty that I'm not doing the same thing for my daughter.  I really admire stay-at-home parents.  They are the best option, hands down.  But I don't really have a choice if I want to finish school - and I do.  And after that I'll need to work to pay off my student loans, not to mention it will be time to use this uber-expensive law degree and make a career for myself.  In this economy, a dual-parent income is almost a necessity.  So I have accepted that hired child care will be a reality for me.  My ideal child care set-up would be for the baby to go to Grandma's house during the day.  And perhaps in the future when we move back east we can have a more individual set-up with a nanny or a family member watching Peanut.  Unfortunately that's not an option here in California.

So we needed to find a place that would keep the Peanut safe, healthy, and loved.  This year is a good introduction into daycare because Peanut will only be enrolled for part of the day while I'm at school, and she'll only go 3 or 4 days a week on the days I have class.  So I feel good about our fall schedule, but unfortunately, there aren't many daycare centers that even accept infants.  I found lots of preschools accepting children age 2 and up, but not many infant care centers that were convenient for us, within our price range, and that didn't scare me. 

We ended up with 3 possibilities.  The first was a Montessori school, with the highest prices.  The babies were all in one room, with cribs lined up along the side wall.  They also took children in that class up to 18 months which I didn't like.  I don't want children walking all over my 2 month old.  I think BA walked away from our tour in shock and a little depressed.  I've worked in daycares before as summer jobs, so I knew what to expect and honestly, the Montessori school was perfectly fine.  The teachers all seemed nice and the babies seemed happy, but I don't think BA was prepared for how impersonal daycare can seem.

The second place was located in a neighborhood and the infants were in their own building.  They had three rooms for different play areas - one room was for babies that could sit up and move around a bit, another had a table with highchairs for eating, and a final room had swings for naps, and tummy time mats for the littlest babies.  All the rooms were connected with 1/2 walls and there was a crib room in the back that was a little darker and quieter than the other play areas. 

The third place I almost didn't tour because we walked in the front door and there was a sign at the front desk that said "Peanut-Free Zone."  I thought, Well we can't go here!   If they don't want the little Peanut, then we don't want them!  Joking aside, it felt like a baby assembly line.  It was the least expensive option and I'm sure it was fine, the babies looked happy, but it just didn't feel homey or warm.  It felt institutional, with florescent lighting and the babies all lined up to eat. 

So we are going with the second school and I'm very happy about it.  I think Peanut will be safe there and I think she'll be loved.  It's the best I could possibly feel about giving my baby over to a stranger for the day.